Toothache in Gaza
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Sameeha Elwan
03-03-2011
I woke up with the
same painful toothache. There is no other choice, then. I have to go for a
dentist. I tried to avoid it, but it was too late. My father was supposed to
make me a dentist appointment.
Unluckily, I had to wait for three more days to
get an appointment. That was out of question. There’s nothing more annoying in
the world than having a toothache headache. It is just unbearable. Hearing my
moaning cries of pain, my father’s voice came from a distance, “If you can’t
handle the pain, then we can just go to the ….” I think I either did not hear
what he said pretty clearly or I simply thought he was kidding. Facing him, I
enquired again,” To go where?”. Clearing his throat, that fearful word came out
of his mouth pretty clear now “El WEKALA” “UNRWA Health Center”. My heart sank,
and shivers ran over my whole body. The image of the place was suddenly all
what I saw. On my way to school every day, I have to pass over two buildings
for UNRWA, one is a health center while the other is the Central Department of
UNRWA, the one which was attacked in the last offensive over Gaza. I guess it
was not the white and blue buildings with the blue Flag of UNRWA which has
always caught my attention. It was rather the scene of the crowded people
lining or trying to keep the lines up to reach that fenced window and the voice
on the microphone calling for either names or numbers. I always couldn’t but
feel sorry for the people who have to wait there in line under the Sun of the
hottest Summer day or the heavy rain of the coldest days of Winter. I never
imagined myself lining up for any reason before. Never have I thought I would
be standing there waiting for my name to be called and struggling to get to
that fenced window with the hope that I would be one of those who are lucky
enough to be called upon and not to wait and wait in vain.
That psychological trauma I was passing through had to wait. With that
unprecedented pain, I surrendered. The visit has to be made whether I like it
or not. After all, how bad would it be to stand there in the lines amongst
other people who would be most probably having all kinds of suffering? Exactly,
my own misery is just not enough.
A sleepless night passed. When I went to my father the next day, I didn’t have
to say a word. His gentle look was trying to smooth my panic He said he had to
go to the center first so that he could get me a place before it gets crowded.
How could a place get crowded at seven in the morning, I wondered!
The way to the center
has brought me much agony as I was thinking of how inconsiderate I have always
been towards my father. He is caught in the same situation once a month or
every couple of months. He has to stand up in line to get us the UNRWA supplies
as we were amongst the lucky Palestinians who enjoy the advantages of the UNRWA
Card. My mother is considered a refugee. I don’t know why some people looked at
that card as a kind of privilege and I wonder why some of them hold it with
such a pride which contradicts with the so little they get in comparison to
what they have really lost. Would a bag of wheat compensate for the land they
have once had? Would a bag of sugar make up for the bitter misery those people
have always felt after losing their sweet homes and having to live in tents,
sometimes? Would the two bottles of oil make them forget their olive trees that
have been mercilessly uprooted as they themselves were? Or maybe, it is simply
a declaration that they are temporarily refugees who have once had the land
which as long as this card is still in their hands would still be waiting for
them to return.
When I arrived at the center, no people were lining outside. I guess that fear
was because of my almost unexplainable phobia of dentists. I think I was only
exaggerating. The white and blue building seems like a real nice quiet place.
My favourite colours have given me some sort of relief which unfortunately
didn’t last for long. The voices of people babbling got clearer the moment I
entered the clinic. Moving my head around the laughably small clinic which
technically was several small rooms where above the door of each was a panel
illustrating different kinds of treatment provided by this health center. The
General Clinic. The Oculist. The Dentist, and the major part was devoted for
Internal Medicine.
So, if you don’t have anything to do with those diseases. Sorry, you have to
search for another place that offers the treatment. Let’s hope you’re not
diagnosed with something serious that not only the UNRWA doesn’t offer its services
to cure, but the medicine needed for your treatment is not allowed to enter the
Gaza Strip. It is technically forbidden for some chemical and security reasons.
Thank God, it is only a toothache, I thought.
My father found his
way to me amongst the crowd. “Why were you so late? I got you a number. You
were about to lose it”, he said. “No way, not the number, I can’t lose the
number after all I had been through”, I thought. Sometimes, you have to forget
about the fact that you are a human being and surrender to you being a number.
I was no longer me. I was Seven. Seven was the only thing I wanted to hear at
this moment. I sat down on the bench my father fetched me. Seeing the state I
was in, he preferred to stand up like most of the people waiting for their
numbers there. The slight difference was that it was not their choice. The five
benches available at the room would by no means suffice the tens of women,
children, men and old people crowdedly standing there. I got a glance at the
woman beside me. My eyes caught the number on the card she held. I was shocked.
For how long does she have to wait for number thirty six when I was number
seven and not called yet? Not for long, I discovered later.
“Number six… Where is Number six…”
A little girl wearing the primary school green uniform stood up. Alone, she got
into the room. I felt ashamed of myself. She is not as coward as to bring her
father with her. She was holding her school bag when she got in. So, most
probably, she’s heading to school after having her tooth removed. In two
minutes, the door opened again. That little girl got out with the same look of
defiance on her face as if declaring “I had finally got you out of my mouth,
you stupid little tooth.” It was not the cotton that made her mouth so bulging
that made me ponder. I was thinking of the time this little girl spent in
there. Two minutes. Not even enough to give her any sort of anesthesia… What a
relief.
For a moment, I
thought about running away. My father dragged me in after the number seven was
summoned, he literary held my hands while I was dragging myself in. The three
doctors seemed very nice. At least, they asked me about my name. I had to lie
on the chair, and in less than a minute, the doctor declared I need a surgical
tooth removal, which, unsurprisingly, the UNRWA clinic does not offer. I forgot
about the pain, all I wanted was to go out of that sterile room. I caught my
breath no longer when I was out. I hurried for the exit of the place and with
the same smile of that little girl, I looked into my father eyes, “See, they
cannot help me, I told you.” My father laughed when he saw that my pale face
has finally returned its usual colour. He raised the little pocket of medicine
into my face, “At least, we got some pain killers”.
” Yes, pain killers”, thoughtfully, I smiled.
